"Am I Ready?" 

I asked myself that question one morning as I stared in the mirror, getting ready to launch my first mastermind for a few brave, busy professionals. I was a nervous wreck! The jagged scar on my chin, etched forever by a silly stunt at age 12, wrinkled up further as I frowned at myself. "Is my program really ready to be seen and experienced yet? Maybe I should just postpone it. Or cancel it altogether! What if they hate it? What if they don't get it? What if..." 

At the soul level, I knew it was time to take a stand for what mattered most in my life. I knew it was time to up-level what I felt most passionate about: Helping professionals age 40 and up, from all walks of life and profession, birth their unique genius, serve the world from that place, and create lives they envision. But I still entertained the idea of calling the whole thing off because it wasn't 'perfect' in my eyes yet. Whatever 'perfect' meant!  

I also had a HUGE fear of being 'seen'.  For years, I was absolutely content analyzing and staffing projects for companies and coaching personal clients one-on-one.  With my new mastermind model, I knew I'd have to step out in a bigger way and have the spotlight shine on me.  In the words of an exasperated Charlie Brown: "Arrrgghhhh!!!"

I didn't WANT to be seen. I wanted to stay comfy and in the shadows. I wanted to lose some weight first. I wanted to wait until I built up my social media presence and "follower" count.  I wanted to wait until I was all over the news first!  (Nice one, Celeste.)  I kept feeding into my fear, focusing on the wrong things and justifying why I wasn't ready.  I knew I'd built a pretty good reputation of getting great results. Both with companies and with my individual clients.  I knew I was a trusted, passionate, and "above and beyond" service type of person.  But I kept coming up with excuses to hold myself back.  

Two weeks before the mastermind was set to launch, I told a good friend that I was thinking of canceling it.  She told me I was absolutely crazy and pretty much stuck on stupid for even considering canceling.  She was right. I recalled all the times I recognized lame excuses in my super-capable clients.  

​In that moment, I recognized within myself a dangerous cycle of Ego, Perfectionism and Misplaced Energy (focusing on the wrong things) that made me rationalize my own stagnation.  To put it plainly, I was addicted to my excuses. They kept me stuck in "getting ready to get ready" mode. I looked super-productive, but was really hiding because I was afraid to look stupid. I was afraid to be seen and judged.

Taking a Stand